- Unless it is your spouse (who, by the way, should eventually become your #1 accountability partner), your partner should be the same sex as you. It is a short step from spiritual to physical intimacy.
- Your partner should truly love and care for you.
- Your partner should have a love of the Scriptures.
- Your partner should be able to detect when you are about to fall into the pit of sin.
- Your partner should be spiritually mature, gentle, and careful (Gal. 6:1).
Once you have established someone as your accountability partner, here are some guidelines to follow:
- You must agree to openness and honesty. Bondage to sin brings deception with it, and some people have been deceptive for years. If you want to be free from the slavery to sin, you start with honesty…even if it is humbling. If your accountability partner asks how you are doing, and you have just fallen into sin, you must honestly admit it.
- You agree to prepare a list of the circumstances that are likely to lead you to fall into sin. Together, make a plan for how to deal with each one. Ask your accountability partner to hold you accountable to it.
- Agree to give your partner freedom to ask the hard questions, without taking offense. For instance, "Have you struggled with your sin today?" Or, "Did you break off that sinful habit or relationship completely, as you said you would?"
- Agree to initiate communication daily for the first 30 days, as far as is possible. If you are unwilling to maintain an accountability relationship, then most likely you will not win the battle against sexual sin for any length of time.
Additional Scriptures: 2 Sam. 10:9-12; Heb. 10:23-25; Prov. 27:17; Eccl. 4:9-12 A great resource: Setting Captives Free. It is a website which offers help to people struggling with gambling, sexual purity, homosexuality, substance abuse, smoking, or bad eating habits. This ministry is adding additional resources from time to time, so check it out.